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PostWysłany: Wto 12:18, 04 Sty 2011  

"Your training begins now. You must practice the inner work of insight every waking moment until you meet the dragon. Seven years of unbroken mindfulness and the dragon will be yours. Never mind seven years - seven months of unbroken mindfulness will accomplish your goal. In fact, if you maintain unbroken mindfulness here for only seven weeks, you will find your key. Disregard seven weeks, for you, seven days of unbroken mindfulness and you will become a key keeper.
Weepasa just said that I could easily die from training with him here [link widoczny dla zalogowanych]! I finally had to face it; it was time to decide if I was willing to risk everything. After all these years of looking inward, however, I had to ask myself who exactly is was that is risking what?
I began the schedule and quickly discovered that relinquishing control wasn't easy. After all, I had been controlling my life for over seventy years! But, for some reason, my trust in this teacher was unconditional [link widoczny dla zalogowanych], and I found that by following this extremely restrictive training of the mind, I was able to let go of my "self," little by little. I did this by being aware of each thought impulse as it arose, as well as the physical emotions and mental feelings, and then releasing them immediately.
The question arose spontaneously in my mind, but it didn't come from me. I couldn't say where it came from: "Why help humanity if they posses no self?"
"There is only one way that my training can be taken to heart [link widoczny dla zalogowanych]," Weepasa warned, "and that is if mindfulness is uninterrupted each wakeful moment of each day. Do you understand what I have just said? Each wakeful moment of the day! Initially you will feel lost and confused because when your mind is not permitted to retain recall of what it observes, it becomes very insecure with only awareness without registration.
"Life is very short," added Weepasa. "If all that you do in this brief moment we call a lifetime is to constantly save yourself again and again, you will never face the ultimate challenge. Saving yourself for the future can be an ongoing delusion, for when that future arrives, you will then save yourself repeatedly. Your habit pattern of quitting will become so ingrained that you will create kamma, the inclination to save yourself continuously, and therefore you will never find the courage to go beyond your ‘self.'
Weepasa's answer was immediate, almost as if he anticipated the question, "Because humanity suffers." And with this, the master waived me off.
I sat perfectly still during my inner work, not moving once I settled into my position. Any inclination to move was always preceded by a thought or physical sensation that I would let go of immediately therefore invalidating the
"You may ask one question."
"But do not succumb to fear. Don't be concerned about your physical health either, for if you are, you will constantly scheme to keep yourself safe, and this will generate thought and break your mindfulness. You truly must be a fearless warrior to reach the key, for you can easily die from the exertion here. But so be it. The effort will serve you well in the next lifetime."
I left Weepasa's room with mixed feelings of apprehension and expectation. This definitely would be the most intensive thing that I had ever attempted, for even in the cave I had some control. Now, I would not be in control but would undeniably be completely free to remain within my inner work because of the structure and support here. This was the Master of Insight that the sorcerer had promised, and I knew that I was very close to the Dragon of Atta. I must not falter. How difficult could it be to maintain complete mindfulness for a mere seven days!
"Here you have an opportunity to break this pattern of many lifetimes of fear, the fear of emptiness, but a man such as you will never find his limits until he goes there. Don't stop halfway as you have done so many times in the past. For once in your uncountable lifetimes, overcome your past kamma and proceed to finality without concern.
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